dots.and.thots

self reassurance

2012-01-05T06:57:00.003+08:00

time and time again i have to tell my ugly half that i am beautiful just the way i am, and that i am an individual of my own quirky ways. but i am but a girl, whom is often steered into being a certain way, that i have to conform to what society thinks is best for them.
not me. them.
i must confess, i am slightly intimidated. and i feel this slightness more often than not. and as it accumulates, this slightness turns into an ugly ball of self hatred.
intimidated how, you say?
oh we women, we like to complicate everything.
"his exes are beautiful, you cant deny that, youre --- you. his exes are crazy, freaks even! you're --- you. his exes --- are his exes."
for a reason.
i know that for a fact. we know these things, right, ladies? but still.
it doesnt help that im pms-ing. and that i feel fat and when i look down i can feel quadruple layers of fat on my chin. and it doesnt help that my exam starts in a while. and it doesnt help that i have all these fucked up thoughts in my head 3 weeks prior to my Indian escapade.
i just wish i would stop being such a --- woman. and just accept the fact that he chose you for a reason, whether he is aware of this reason or not, shouldnt be questioned --- yet. because he will eventually realize it. and so will you, Tash.
you don't have to suddenly pick up new hobbies like pole dancing , or start consuming alcoholic beverages to look cool , or dress like a super whore from down under (literally) just so you fit into the mould, the idea of a past love he would like to reminisce upon once in a blue moon. because the truth is, he loves you for who you are.
ladies, if he doesnt , then he's a prick. dont change. youre beautiful no matter how hot his exgf's are :)
damn you pms.

lies.

2012-01-02T19:43:00.002+08:00

ive left these questions unquestioned. the answers will remain unanswered. because i know i wont like what i hear.
like so many, i too, like to fill in the blotches of my imagination with my own substance.
like so many, i too would rather hear my own words, rather than yours.
like so many, i am hurt and i would prefer nothing but nice things to be said. and i know i might not get that from you. so i'll put in my own words. i like my own words. they sound better. they make me feel better even.
and like so many, i will be disappointed. i will be in dismay. i will be aggravated by the fact that after all the made up conversations i invented, the smart answers ive etched in my brain, i still will find the answers. the answers that i never wanted to hear.

..

2011-12-28T02:32:00.001+08:00

empty and vulnerable. two things that dont go too well together. especially because they now reside in me. on how i wish i was stronger. how i wish i was lighter. how i wish i could just stop wishing.

2011-12-22T06:04:00.001+08:00

for fucks sakes laa. why the fuck is this happening now. what the fuck?

hollow.

2011-12-22T03:55:00.000+08:00

i feel hollow. inside. i have no insides. besides the fact that i've been shitting my brains out these couple of days. there is nothing in this cavity you boastfully claim to call a soul.
pray tell, do you feel this mischievous emotion playing tricks on you as well? do you have the depth of sorrow as i have successfully plunged?
i think not. because we plunge from different angles. jump into different black holes.
if ever i needed a hug? this would be a perfect time to get one.

of past loves.

2011-12-04T02:09:00.001+08:00

i havent seen this side of the blogsphere in quite some time.
today i just feel like ranting about how some people can be so funnily ironic. and by funnily ironic i mean utterly kampung.
dont get me wrong. im a kampung girl too :) and i like the kampung, way better than town sometimes. but when you act like you come from one big shot family wearing all these designer labels and decide to label yourself cool and hip, then i suggest you not leave your mentality behind.
just because im dating a person who does not share the same religious beliefs as i do does not automatically make me an official resident of hell. i dont even know if you have beliefs, let alone practice them, and therefore at least, be in a position to judge me. if your religion says dont go around fucking, then why the hell are you doing so? and what makes you any different form my bf and i?
you see, if you were a person of class and if you respect me, or respect yourself, you wouldnt humiliate yourself by asking such stupid questions.

mak OK jer.

2011-11-13T17:34:00.001+08:00

Tasha apa khabar? lama sangat tak post? lama tak nampak batang hidung?

mak OK jer. don worry laa you alls.

who are you?

2011-11-11T03:35:00.001+08:00

if you're chirpy with classmates, grumpy with family, manja with partners, and wacko with bestfriends, who are you really?
i think who you are is determined by what you're like when you're by yourself. and if that is true, then i am one sad ass motherfucker.

closest thing to you.

2011-10-30T01:32:00.000+08:00

this.

2011-10-30T00:22:00.002+08:00

it's been too long, and it seems as though blogging is no longer a part of my life anymore. the sleepless restless nights don't end with me tapping away on my keyboard, and no more comment moderating, no more anons to mock me and try to put me down.
quick re cap of what's been going on : degree in bio whatsa ma fuck fuck is okay. i'm enjoying the laid back classes as compared to those diploma days. and for those asking / sibuking : no, it's not awkward having Brad around in class. we've always been the best of friends, that has not changed. i'm getting unifi fixed in my apartment in Klang, so i guess blog more when its fixed.
ive decided to just be consistent. as a non hijab wearer. i feel when i try to wear it, i dont feel like i should 24/7, and i have no feeling of istiqamah (berterusan melaksanakan perintahNya) so i decided if i'm not going to do it like i actually mean it, im not going to do it at all. i know deep down im not doing it right. it's so simple for you to say i must do this because God asked us to, but you probably already have that passion for this religion, and you probably feel the enlightenment of having a peace of mind when you perform your duties. i don't feel all these things, and so when i perform whatever it is we perform, i am merely putting forth an action. you, are actually embodying the process, basking in your personal moments of intimacy with your Creator. i feel none of that.
no human wants not to know what peace of mind feels like. and i am human.

when people say "i write want i want laa" i actually do, as risky as this is of being belittled by you "holier-than-thou" lot. but i want to send this across. there are people who are as confused as me, and by forcing your beliefs down my throat, you just make me hate you and your beliefs more. i am allowed to an opinion, i have the right to make my own decisions. all you have to do is respect that.

2011-10-02T00:46:00.000+08:00

i miss you guys. but im so swamped in --- crap.

life changing.

2011-08-24T00:33:00.000+08:00

lamanya tak post omagah! i missed chuu!so fast forward to august, a week left for raya. 3 weeks more to the 4th semester of my degree. and life has just made a tumble for the best. everything is just topsy truvy, but i'm adapting. i've become more of an optimistic person, thanks to the LDR. and i'm just sculpting myself into a sleeker, clean finished person. the person i need to be.

friends of mine have been so supportive, not-so friends have been, well, negative. but that's quite sad because that projects the type of person you are.
Mr. O has been super supportive. had a 5 hour chat with him the other day. suddenly there were so many options in life lay out for me. thank you.
thank you, everyone, for being so supportive.

now all i have to do is get through this degree, get through this LDR, and just, LIVE.

getting through this.

2011-08-13T00:09:00.000+08:00

stick together, like the sticky ends of recombinant DNA <3

thank you, family, for being there for me.

iloveya'll

change.

2011-08-10T18:16:00.000+08:00

you know what? i feel like shutting this blog down. or just starting over. i can definitely see the changes in myself through my writing (more ranting if you ask me) for the past 3 years. i feel like this is an old diary, and i need to get a new one, to symbolize my growth as a person, and as a new being. im not changing, im learning.
so it's between shutting this down, or leaving it as a memory (private), or just go on with this and keep it as a life journal. i have so many things to say, but i feel like this blog doesnt represent the things i need to say.

.

2011-08-04T17:48:00.000+08:00

Aunty Don and Chris

holding myself together, barely.

mubarak.

2011-08-01T02:53:00.000+08:00

ive been away for awhile. not planning on coming back anytime soon. im praying everyone is doing fine ;) happy fasting people. may this Ramadhan bring you barakah. i hope you find what youre looking for, within yourself, or all around. its the perfect time. no distractions, no shaitan.

hiatus.

2011-07-08T23:18:00.000+08:00

i feel like, if i dont do this now, i'll have so much of explaining to do later on. why should i be explaining myself? because, the 3 year relationship we had affected the people around us as well, and they deserve to know. after all, we practically were in each others faces 24/7.
it's over. it's been over, for almost a month now. we both finally saw that the relationship was too comfortable, and it was all a set up routine we both endured everyday, unconsciously, without thinking, just seeing each other would be a must. why? because that's what we had been doing the past 3 years.
without a doubt, i love you. still do. and you did nothing wrong. we were just stuck, not going anywhere. and im glad we both parted as friends, in good terms.
from this side of the story, i prolly sound like a bitch for leaving you, with the excuse of falling in love with someone else. but that's the truth and i love the fact that we are honest with each other, and i could tell you this. if not, i think we'd just be on a roadtrip to nowhere for the rest of our lives.
i still love you, always will. still care :) i hope you can forgive me. i hope you find someone to share your life with. thank you for the life lessons, the hardships you helped me endure, the blood sweat and tears.

does he tell you?

2011-06-25T16:58:00.000+08:00

have been slightly distracted. slightly. a big change has come my way. BIG. bear with me lovely readers, and friends. i do wish it were different for you-know-who-you-are.

Stellar.

2011-06-06T00:30:00.000+08:00

hello people. whatsap brasap? Whats App Bras App? wow. i may be on to something here. i started my morning with Nasi Lemak AND lontong with maiamira. then packed for Banting, BUT BUT what what in the butt (tumblrians can relate to this) on the way, i stopped for the Stellar event with PIPI :) sempat jumpa kak AMI CAT! awww. the only reason i came back from Kajang ;) i had an awesome time, okay! seronok meronok! cuma nya, panas sedikit due to poor ventilation, maybe? or maybe because there was like a SEA OF PEOPLE!

a new found friend AINA. you are such a ball of energy!

Pastelina's Shea & Yanny, Ma sista from anothah mothah Maria, and kak Ami cat :)

my date for the day PIPI comel. no, her name is pipi, im not telling you her pipi comel, because that's like -- a fact. duh?

with Mas, the organizer :)

the awesome sisters, AishahAmin & FatimahAmin

and if you don't know who this is, well, then i'll be darned. meow-ish ;)

starstruck sangat. the mother of maysaa.com, the one and only Hana Tajima Simpson

maghia as Karen O, me as the singer of Florence and the Machines (of which im coming to like, more and more) and of cos akak pipi comel as Zooey Deschanel comel :)

didnt get to buy anything, cz im kinda saving up for a bed ;) but it was so worth my time! these lovely ladies are just so ---- LOVELY. i cant describe the adrenalin rush i had. unless that was heat stroke from the temperature.

farewell, blogland

random schmandom.

2011-06-05T04:49:00.000+08:00

School Hols, Cool Hols.

2011-06-05T03:23:00.000+08:00

the past week, i've been in Aunty Don's house in Kajang. tomorrow i'll be heading back there and go to Banting :) Nana's house. why should i tell you? so you will think i have a life ;)

in Kajang all we did was look for Angry Birds <3 like, seriously. nak keluar je "where to go la?" Metropoint ? macam tak ada tempat lain.

visiting Boey in Kampar for the second week in a row. ibu demam rindu -______-"

jadi, sekarang saya baru bangun, dan kebosanan, dan lapar because it's 3.22 am. tertidur pula. menyesal juga tidur. i'll be packing, now to balik kampung :) love <3

BABYSITTING / TUTORING

2011-05-30T17:51:00.000+08:00

dear friends, i'm looking for a part time job, and since i love children so mych, ive decided to look for a job as either a babysitter or a tutor.
anyone with job info for me, or need a hand with your kids, please email me at natasha.gideon@gmail.com please.
i'm very good with children and as ya'll know, im a diploma holder now continuing studies in biomolecular sciences (degree B.Sc)
spread the word please :) i live in sungai buloh, but i have my own transport, so anywhere around sg buloh, pj or damansara is cool :)
thanks guys!

Fresh.

2011-05-29T21:33:00.000+08:00

i am on the verge of a super large deluxe depression with fries on the side. everyday i feel like just dissappearing into the dark. far away from this cruel world. and then i realize that i cant let myself control myself. confusing.

im moving house soon. 2 weeks more, to be exact. still nearby this house, just that this time it'll only be us 3. mum, boey and me. boey, by the way, is now in UTAR Kampar Perak, so mum is a bit stressed out that her baby is finally growing into a man - finally. and all this moving and stuff is really not helping.

oh, so touch-ching.

as for me? im still figuring out wth im supposed to do for the rest of the 3 month break. so i bought this.

just call him jones :)

what i wore :

cheering myself up with vibrant colours ;)

have a nice monday tomorrow.

no matter who you are, i love you :)

as long as your name isnt aishahbabi.

im very vengeful.

when in doubt, SHOP!

2011-05-28T00:36:00.000+08:00

my very cantik friend has just set up a new blogshop of her own, and im loving it! especially the chiffon-material-like tops. orang bertudung boleh pakai, tak bertudung pun boleh pakai :)

http://www.cupipipinky.blogspot.com/

is the place to be!

hurry! buy her stuff and help her feed her cute lil rabbits!

why would i even bother.

2011-05-26T07:43:00.000+08:00

that feeling when you open up to that special person(s), baring your soul, because you trust and love, because you know nothing but positivity can be thrown back at you. and then that feeling when it actually turns out to be the exact opposite.
it kind of relates to this blog thing too. i share my most valued thoughts, insights, and personal affairs, and you decide to tell me that because of what you have read, you absent mindedly decided to hate me. decided that because i write in a certain way, or dress in a certain way, that i am not 'up to your standards'.
but that's not really my point, love.
i can relate to Rachel Zevita from American Idol.
she sang a really cabaret, sexy saucy song despite her emo personality, and bore her insecurities, and America decides, nahh, we don't really like you eventhough you've humiliated yourself in front of the entire globe.

some people just don't know when to stop. they'd rather put people down, hurt peoples' feelings so that they could crack a joke for a mere 5 seconds of insignificant superiority.

is it that obvious that i am secretly sensitive?

Peter.

2011-05-26T03:04:00.002+08:00

22, again.

2011-05-17T23:28:00.000+08:00

yesterday as seen in the post below, i had birthday lunch. today i was surprised with a birthday dinner :) dari haritu lagi dok tanya, "what should i get you? i tak tahu nak belikan you apa"

so we went to look for our favourite restaurant Muhibbah, because it moved from TTDI to Kg Sg Penchala. Alhamdulillah, jumpa juga. besar gila, macam mana tak jumpa. and i got the perfect pressie. tp i taknak lah tunjuk u olls. malu, nanti kena panggil pompuan berlagak lagi dek mak enon aishah. ergh -_____-

didn't want it to end. it's one of those days you just feel like freezing in time.
thank you so much! :) i deserve you, and nothing less, nothing more.

what i was wearing :

:) happy 22.

Brisik.

2011-05-17T23:04:00.000+08:00

on the date of my birthday (16th May) i had to help my brother, Danial, register for his university application bagai lah. was tiring because it was so fricking hot!

but after that, we decided to belanja each other nice birthday lunch because Danial's birthday is on the 14th of May. so i bawak these boys to merasa makan dekat Brisik, a place i was brought to by the ILSYA SISTERS masa i helped them 'model' their hijab. no, saya bukan model. cuma tempat tumpang letak tudung dan platform mengambil gambar :D

some fun facts i found out today were : adik saya suka ayam penyet // saya clumsy yang amat kerana memecahkan gelas orang sematamata nak set camera to timer // pashmina saya okay tanpa sebarang pin mahupun peniti // saya sayang adik saya <3 AND YES! HE IS BIGGER THAN ME EVENTHO IM THE ELDEST!

here goes, 22.

2011-05-16T09:32:00.000+08:00

this year, for my birthday, i graduated with the people i love, who have supported me throughout this whole course of 3 years. thank you. i cannot describe the feeling, though. just pure love and happiness :)

huff puff, blown away.

2011-05-03T12:31:00.000+08:00

it's an hour before i take my biology paper and i'm on the internet looking for Cath Kidston wallpaper. why? because i can. and because i'm bored of biology eventhough i'm supposed to love this subject -_______- macam mana tak stress bila aku exam tapi orang lain kawen? nak kawen jugak, tapi taknak stop belajar. immature, yes. i am aware.

so why blog? siapa nak baca? well for one, i have no one to talk to. and two, im making myself look like im busy so that people dont halau me from this bench.

too many changes are coming my way and i hate change. its like basic human law that people dont like change and that im supposed to adapt. im not supposed to adapt, i have to. oh, carry mark biochem 27 over 50. bai.

#RoyalWedding.

2011-04-29T22:40:00.000+08:00

Kate's wedding dress by Sarah Burton from Alexander McQueen

source

were you in on the action? the wedding of the century was almost perfect. it would've been perfect if Diana were there though. the wedding dress was worth the jam coming back from Shah Alam. Kate did her own make-up and wore her hair down. definitely shows that she's is a people's-princess. the tiara she was wearing was a Cartier 1936 (if not mistaken) and her veil was just so befitting of her dress.it was definitely a Grace-Kelly-ish design.

source : here

some even said the dress had a hint of kebaya.

the other tear-jerker was the wedding vows, in which Kate did not promise to "obey" her husband but instead made their own vows to each other. the moment they saw each other at the altar, William looked at Kate and said "You look beautiful." it's just so cute how they look at each other in a way we all can understand that they're in love with each other.

video of the vows

after the 15 minute ride in their newlywed carriage, i was quite overwhelmed by emotions already, with the dress and the vows and the glow in each of their faces, i was quite looking forward to the kiss, as my friend UMMEK has tweeted me that Westminter Abbey is a sacred place, and that kissing in its vicinity is prohibited. so the ever so epic kiss was planted on the luscious lips of the new Duchess of Cambridge on the famous balcony of Buckingham Palace.

their second kiss i presume. the first kiss was a mere 2 seconds, was awkward and short. this one was perfect.

this picture will be talked about for generations to come.

poor lil flower girl

source

oh, and the queen was super adorable in her light pastel yellow outfit. i must say, that for a woman of 85, she sure knows her fashion! kudos Queen Elizabeth!

ter matching dengan Arch Bishop.

something else that caught my attention was the 'Fascinators'. sekali tengok, macam watehell kindof hats are those? then when you get to see the really glamourous ones, i was like, kenapa baru tahu ini wujud!

are you effing kidding me. pregnant lady with louboutin's on? my hats are off to you me lady. get it? hats off? no? okay, moving on.

okay, i was actually looking forward to seeing what these two would be wearing. they've been nominated by the people, for being the ugliest princesses around -_____-" okay what? ada ciri ciri ke-gaga-an di situ. must say, im not loving the blue outfit.

Princess Eugene of York & Princess Beatrice of York, respectfully.

source

there's definitely so much more to talk about, but the highlights of the day shall do. it was such a lovely occasion, and i am writing, they are still not done yet with the whole ceremony. im glad i was here to watch it. Princess Diana & Alexander McQueen would be smiling right now :)

The Princess & the Pea : Uncovered.

2011-04-27T02:27:00.001+08:00

Princess and the Penis. What she really had under those mattresses.

if this were any other subject, i wouldn't be doodling like this. srsly. but --- in 6 hours i will be sitting for my C++ Programming exam and i DO NOT know shit about it.

goodluck ~~penis~~ peeps :)

of secrets i tried to bury.

2011-04-25T18:01:00.000+08:00

life is just getting worse and worse. i dont know how to balance this out anymore. feeling insecure about everything. i was never like this before. i guess you train yourself to be strong, up to a point that you realize there's no point. people will never stop until they see you at your weakest. so here i am, bare and open. see through me. i am but a fragile being trying hard in life only to feel rejected.

go on, and haunt me, taunt me, mock me all you want. i will still be here feeling this way because this is my lowest.

who do you turn to when everybody is your enemy? even yourself?

x

2011-04-24T00:31:00.000+08:00

you don't hate me, you like me :)
you stalk me because you care :)

and so do i.

with all my jelly filled hearts ♥

Earth Day.

2011-04-22T18:21:00.000+08:00

happy earth day 11' people :) the only mother that will be here for your childrens' children. mother nature :)

of friendships and fakeships.

2011-04-18T06:42:00.001+08:00

it's 6.27am and ive been trying to sleep, but i toss and turn thinking about my whole 'friends-for-life' principle. i never knew how hardcore i was into this friendship thing, until Opie & Wtf talked to me about it.

"Minah ni bukan boleh, janji jumpa pagi kang dia tak tido semata-mata"

i literally change my plans so that it revolves around my ' friends' ' plans. and most of the time they are last minute plans, but hey, im in this to win this , right?

i like to look at things from an economic angle. example : my boyfriend is now an asset and a very good investment. my 'friends' are most of the time an LIABILTY, and after BANYAK years i have come to this realization.

FACEBOOK on the other hand, is getting on my nerves. it's like my new myspace. my new personal hate space. i don't get why people can't respect my privacy. i don't like outsiders peeking into my life as if it's their bloody right just because 'kita penah kenal kot dulu'. excuse me but you have been a bitch since you masuk diploma with your new attitude and never once have spoken to me. NOT EVEN ONCE IN 3 YEARS and you expect a really nice welcome note and an approval to my bbm pin with flowers and a hug? and dare you complain about it? the audacity of some people, really. but then again, you probably have many bad experiences in the rejection department, with you being so kampung and all.

so what was i saying? oh yea. ive deleted another 70 people on my facebook today. if you're not on it, i'm sorry but its's my facebook-given right to do so. so by all means, you can block me if you want, i wouldn't care less. i'd probably delete more if it weren't for the fact that facebook is cheaper than sms'ing.

heck i haven't deactivated it only because my long lost family members are on it. aku bukan best sangat pun nak jadi kawan fesbuk korang.

emo nya minah ni? yes. emo. sejak beberapa bulan. i won't let myself be used by you guys anymore. i must start saying no. and ive done it to 70 people already. bring it on.

OMG THIS IS GREAT!

2011-04-16T17:10:00.000+08:00

have really nice sex and she'll say this is great.

Bruno, i never said that. tipu jeww abang ni. ihiks.

*cue slap*

sizzling suzai.

2011-04-16T16:54:00.000+08:00

have you read her blog yet? go. now!

sizzlingsuzai

thanks a bunch deary.

the only girl in the world.

2011-04-16T16:41:00.000+08:00

who has friends as awesome as this.

i miss sleeping next to you.

2011-04-15T03:25:00.000+08:00

i miss you day by day. stress getting the best of me, and you not being here to comfort me.

i remember those sleepless nights just listening to you, and you listening to me. and in the morning we wake up and laugh because your by my legs while my head lies perfectly next to yours. soft hues of the morning light shine upon us, and we wake, like the blossoms in the spring. happiness is what you bring,

i promise to wake up to you everyday of my 4 month holidays.

and sing with you until we fall asleep.

and do more covers. okay baby?

P/S : im not the only one who sleeps with her guitar, Jimi Hendrix did it too. just proves i'd rather be with an inanimate object than sleep around like a slut. oops. teringat konvo nanti ada aishah. emo. ihiksihiksharapharapkaumengandungklepasnitakkacauaku

byeeeeee <3 positivity! SHERAH, UMEKK, WANIMENG : YEEE NANTI SAYA COVER LAGUUUU OKAYYY
:D

Minah Tudung pergi Clubbing.

2011-04-03T21:05:00.002+08:00

kat tengahtengah tu kitorg stall kejap. tapi we danced until my memory was low so, yeah. please waste your precious time by watching my bro and i conduct embarrassing behaviour.

make up tutorial : how to look like a whore.

2011-04-03T17:47:00.000+08:00

aishah actually taught me how to wear make up like this. ahh professionals.

Chic Pop 7.

2011-04-03T00:54:00.000+08:00

what the dilly yaww? say gudmawwnin' to maa homies. it's not friday friday but it is chic pop day! (no tash, not funny)

went to chic pop 7 alone because i am awesome, and got myself waaaay too much stuff! as seen below :

from top : bajukurung rm5, skull chiffon shirt rm25, floral cotton on cardigan from nurultalktalk rm10, silky brown skirt rm20 also from nurultalktalk, and i even got sweets from nurultalktalk's booth for buying her stuff. awwww* cue the cute kittehs

okay, before i show you why this is awesome (as if you dont already know) i bought this from an unblogged shop. the beige cut out back shirt is rm38, and the green tiered peter pan TOPSHOP top was rm58. now for the awesome reveal *gasp* dia jual dekat saya RM85 for both. rembat*

the green one is exactly like this, only difference is it's rm58, and this peach one is rm200+ :D

even the cutout shirt is TOPSHOP inspired, but couldn't get the picture for it,though.

setelah kepenatan dan kehabisan uang, saya ke Sunway menemani jejaka indomee untuk makan tengahari, tetapi berlanjutan pula hingga ke malam -______-" beliau rajin bekerja, walaupun kerjanya adalah menghidang indomee di jaya jusco! saya kagum dengan komitmen beliau! syabas!

oh, satu benda yang menyerlahkan kebodohan aku hari ini :

my kaki got melecet and sore like hell, so i went to SoxWorld lah to buy socks. i chose yellow. why? ''coz it was all yellowwww.'' no Chris Martin. bad advice. i looked like i had Lime Disease. like my hempedu gave out and left my whole body to decay and turn yellow! i looked awful. in the end i walked around Sunway WITHOUT SHOES WHILE BRAD CARRIED THEM FOR ME SAMPAI KE KERETA. so thank you, yellow socks. i owe you my life ----- NOT.

what i wore :

so i guess it's kinda cool enjoying my own company :)

featured creature.

2011-04-01T17:36:00.000+08:00

thank you sizzling suzai, for featuring me in your blogpost :) terharu maks. HERE!

COOL BLOG, COOL STYLE!

jumpa kawankawan semua di Chic Pop, esok? ia adalah temujanji (it's a date!)

prelove party.

2011-03-28T22:37:00.000+08:00

i went to the OBB pre-love party lat saturday with @wtfity :) dah ada twitter sekarang, kena sebut nama twitter. met new people there, finally made conversation (proper conversation) with others. yang peliknya, the only thing i was excited about was the sirap bandung! SEDAP GILA! beli duaaaaaaa.

finally got to take a picture with the ever so lovable fashionable gigitable kak amischaheera

kak sueannajoe :) she was like " oh i know why you're familliar! i saw you on youtube with talking carl! tickletickletickle!" kak sue, when you do it it sounds so cute, tengok balik video tu rasa nak slap myself -___-"

back at the faculty with my date for the weekend, watif!

and then yesterday we checked out MBO Harbour Place, Klang. watched RANGO!

bersama abang 'Aaron Aziz' dan popcorn in a bag (?)

and my latest craze is kuah rojak mak bee which can be found in plaza alam sentral dekat bawah sekali :)

<3 til next week, i guess :(

call me a sinner.

2011-03-20T19:34:00.000+08:00

i know exactly what is right and what is wrong, i just do not act upon each and every detail of it. im not talking about religion though. i want to speak out for all us oppressed women.

have you ever thought for a second why the heck so many muslimah's are trying to dress to impress when it is clear that we are supposed to dress modest, and not attract any attention. but with bright pink stillettos and silk flowy dresses, even i, as a woman am intrigued.

i love fashion, i swear it's a religion by itself and i would be it's very obedient follower *metaphore, don't take me too seriously* i would rather starve myself at home than go out looking like Courtney Love, not even on her sober days.

and as much as i hate myself for being a minah-becok, i do not have a button to control my faux-pas sensory glands. i swear if i ever see a girl in a head-cover wearing fricking PANTYHOSE i would definitely regurgitate my own lunch in front of the scantily-clad-self-proclaimed-hijabista. WHO THE FUCK WEARS PANTYHOSE WITH AN ASS-LENGTH TOP WITH A PASHMINA. pantyhose? seriously? first leggings and now this? i wish i had a photo. let me search *goes through facebook albums of annual dinner* tak jumpa.

anyway, it's a simple debate. but sensitive, yes i'm aware. im not role model of the year either. just saying.

if fashion were a sin, then call me a sinner.

Fried Egg = Friday.

2011-03-19T13:39:00.000+08:00

hello and welcome to the most useless weblog in the entire blogsphere, with me , tasha. if this is your first time reading this blog, then you might wanna know why people actually come here, they look for useless information that may get you a slap in the face if you try to impress a girl at your local mamak. but to me, you're a cool dude with perfect blog taste :)

i am aware that today is indeed saturday, but hey, in the middle of the week, you wake up 2 or 3 hectic classes/workload later and ask yourself " what f*uckin day of the week IZIT? ''. OH BUT NOT TO WORRY! Rebecca Black is here to save the day my fellow cyberbuds.

WHO IS SHE, you say?

just watch this video and tell me if you still think Dr.Bombay has the worst song in the world :

okay, so here's the explanation to this viral youtube video, made easy by my favourite youtuber :

what the faakkkkk were you thinkin' bit*h? i don't need anyone to tell me whether tomorrow is saturday if today is in actual fact, FRI-FUCKIN-DAY.

please, save us from this all. btw, she had 17million views last night, just now she hit 19million. i should make a really crappy song too. and do you realize how the song resembles JB's Baby?

bitch needs to pull her shit together.

bioville : it's not as lame as it sounds.

2011-03-19T03:29:00.000+08:00

it's been too long! how is everybody? banyak sangat crap yang berlaku semenjak last post. ahmagadddd siap hilang blackberry AND touch n go -_______-"

BUT hey, life has its ups and downs. and currently im shivering naked by the lower ground floor if you get my sarcasm.

positivity boost *captain marvel heroic pose*

so last week my course ( biomolecular sciences ) held a 2 day 1 night trip to help paint a masjid in Janda Baik and have our annual dinner that night itself. i went with my torn pagoda and ugly tudung (which i had disposed of by the end of the trip)
i wish i had more pics but i was so busy i forgot laa.

theme : urban traditional. i wore a dress with my RM15 kebaya top *gasp* and brad wore kemeja which was nowhere near 'urban traditional'.

i was so tired i slept in this house. dandan depa nak tangkap gambaq.

paradise, unfinished.

rasanaklempangcikgushida

happiest day turns worst.

2011-03-10T21:34:00.000+08:00

guess what?

9th march was a very special date on the calender for me.

guess what?

10th march was a very dreadful date. i lost my blackberry T_________________T

stress. jangan contact saya kalau taknak kena makan.

on matters that don't matter.

2011-03-08T10:16:00.000+08:00

and so it has happened. i have finally lost the battle of constant updating to up myself! and all is lost to the absence of a broadband sticky thingamajiggy -_____-"

tahu kah anda ?

semenjak saya masuk degree, saya masih belum berkawan rapat dengan mana-mana perempuan?
ini bermakna camping trip hujung minggu ini saya akan berbilik dengan stranger.
saya kerap kali terjaga malam dan memandang ke arah tingkap yang terbuka semenjak membaca kisah HANTU SEKSYEN 2 SHAH ALAM !
SAYA TIDUR SORANGSORANG DENGAN TINGKAP TERBUKA KERANA MENYEWA SEORANG TAKUT KENA MAKAN HANTU (rimas tutup tingkap).
selalu SANGAT mimpi terajang aishah tapi bangunbangun mesti hampa sebab it wasn't real D:
saya rindu blogging.

mencabar kan hidup di Shah Alam. hantu pun kaw kaw lat taiko habis.

matters of the heart, and liver.

2011-02-23T11:35:00.000+08:00

im online a lot, but i don't have anything to update. sometimes i just wish i had a blackberry so i could tweet my frustrations away! but life isn't that awesome so i'll just have to wait :P

so for the most part of this post, i will be taking part in the faculty elections.

i have a problematic liver which causes my brain to produce highly intoxicating bubbles of DESTRUCTION!

and i'm an obsessive compulsive liar which makes you love me even more :)

oh but then again, the world isn't that perfect is it? Libya is ruled by an animal and what is more important to you? unfollowing JUSTIN BIEBER ON TWITTER COZ HE CUT HIS FRIGGIN HAIR.

Lovebirds are LOVE.

2011-02-16T22:22:00.000+08:00

what i wore for a day out with the girls ;)

Maze is AMAZE-ING!

2011-02-14T01:54:00.000+08:00

not funny ay? try it out. it's like zaman computer gedabak and ICQ and stuff but it's cool. terasa macam main game istana takeshi

MANIAC WORLD GAME

AKU TENGOK MACAM SENANG TAPI KALAH JUGAK #$%^&**&

anywhere, with you.

2011-02-14T01:42:00.000+08:00

nampak tak jiwang-ness di situ? bukan main lagi iye. hectic tak hectic juga lah hidup setakat ini. boyfriend kerja hujung minggu, saya tidur. boyfriend balik dari kerja, penat dan nak masuk tidur, saya baru nak bangun. susah kan hidup saya? -_____-"

den nak keluar dating pun, tak sampai setengah hari (perlu ke setengah hari) tapi okay what. at least dapat keluar. tried to go to Kak sueannajoe's clearance sale kat itudio studio tapi barang pun dah tak ada, so i got myself a cupcake lipbalm thingamajiggy :D now my lips are cupcakey!

i tried to do the Y U NO face

me : SAYANG, Y U NO PAY ATTENTION TO ME?

haters gonna hate

LOLZ

my darling Watif <3

takdaq hang, aku mungkin mati pucuk di Shah Alam.

what else do you expect. gambar macam ini saja yang dapat saya berian buat masa ini. kalau kurang kasih sayang nanti saya bagi gambar lagi :)

Dear 165 to 171.

2011-02-11T01:31:00.000+08:00

Salam'alaikum yaa followers warreaders. kaifa halukum? ana bikhair? au ana bikhairy? au ana bi izzkhairy? oh no. itu saya <3

lame eh? sorry. born a loser, always a loser. and no. im not taking arabic, don't worry. im taking frigging japanese. frigg lah.

omaigod korang, ai rasa cam - lamaa gila tak update, like seriously ! (shrill cheerleader tone) saya takde broadband, kalau ada pun, saya tak bawak laptop. dalam proses metamorfosis laptop dari besar ke notebook :) pau mak punya notebook. anak tak kenang jasa. i made her think my larger laptop has a better screen for her eye sight. the truth is, my power of my spectacles are higher than hers so whatevs.

and my new but secondhand phone is ready. yey! so i get two NEW secondhand objects (?)

so, to follower number 165, thats my birthday number, i wanted to thank you or put your link up or something, tapi gambar you tak appear dekat followers gadget. awak either anonymous or your picture macam i jugak - non existent. sejak bla entah gambar aku tak keluar. and 166 167 168 169 170 171 you guys are amazing. thank you so much. yang lain sayang juga :)

esok saya update lah pakai laptop lama tapi baru bagi saya :) toodles ♥

Pulling Off the Harem.

2011-02-01T21:19:00.000+08:00

<3 happy birthday nana

month for love.

2011-02-01T01:26:00.000+08:00

well hello loveables ♥

so i hear it's february. yippee. it's not that it's V-day that's got me so happy, it's just a nice month and many memorable occasions were 'embedded' in February ;)

expressing myself in the only way i possibly know.


Topshop Lace Neck Tunic can you get anymore romantic than this lovely number? ZARA Floral Long Dress with Belt :) it just has love written all over it. satu dah dapat, tapi nak jugak yang lagi satu tu. you may love February, but i love MARCH more ♥

Breakeven by The Script acoustic cover

2011-01-31T23:13:00.000+08:00

what am i supposed to do when the best part of me is you?

i was inspired to do this video after watching this video

:'(

lai lai tudung murah.

2011-01-30T20:51:00.001+08:00

okay, even if you tak nak beli pun, i nak letak kat sini jugak. if anything please email me at natasha.gideon@gmail.com please :) 01269769785 ;)

ini yang saya jual dulu tapi ini saya punya. selling for RM15 only. SH01

same piece in maroon mustard and grey. RM15. half price habis. SH02

sweet tak sweet tak? me loves! but i jarang sangat pakai sekarang. RM5 only. SH03

yang bawah ni 3 RM10, sehelai RM 4 :)

dark cocoa

light grey

turqouise

this colourful pice i got from farah habibi

its a bit smaller than normal jojet shawl

RESERVED FOR AINSHAQENA

SH04

ini paisley corak black and white. lawa sangat kan?

RM7 SH05

ini juga dari farah habibi :)

krispy kreme rasanya nama shawl ini :)

imported from Dubai eh Farah? but surely satisfying!

has gold dots outlining the circles

RM10. bought for RM25. SH06

RM5 sahaja. square shawl. SH07

Donatello square shawl, a bit smaller than regular square hijab. i think bidang 40 instead of 45.

ini RM5 juga. bought for RM20

SH08

korang beli lah banyakbanyak haa, aku bagi dis-ka-on. nego lah dengan saya yag bahik hati ini :)

beli banyak dapat free gift ;)

pos exspres RM4

COD available, just tell me where you stay, kalau aku boleh sampai aku sampai la :)

nak jual tudung.

2011-01-30T19:27:00.002+08:00

yang sudah dipakai. kerana terlalu banyak, dan obsesi ini memakan ruang di atas hanger IKEA saya yang sudah pun dua bijik. tak mampu beli lagi satu hanger kerana akan lebih obses memenuhkan hanger itu jua! sekarang sudah lebih 70+ shawl. dan saya mahu jual. awak awak nak tak?

Aku Keturunan Hang Tuah.

2011-01-28T02:56:00.000+08:00

baca title yang diri sendiri post, rasa seolah-olah aku tulis "aku keturunan mix, aku memang nak semua orang tahu supaya orang cakap aku cantik" sorry. sedang panas hati dengan aishababi. emo pula.

anyways. for your information, tadi ai tengoktengok fesbuk mak ai, dia punya profile pictre dah dua kali tukar pun ai still tak onlineonline lagi. ish. fasha tak suka! ( that is NOT A TYPO)

rupanya, bukan main hemsemboi lagi orang ini. siapa dapat teka Hang Tuah ini siapa?

standing row, second from the left.

jejaka dalam family aku semua memang hensem. termasuk lah aku. dah lah macho. misai tebal. bulu kaki pun kasar. *pegang microphone nyanyi lagu "Sejati"*

hemsem ta hemsem nya ♥ aku :)

3-year-old recites poem, "Litany" by Billy Collins

2011-01-24T02:20:00.000+08:00

Black Swan.

2011-01-24T02:11:00.000+08:00

Black Swan is starred by Natalie Portman who was awarded Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture – Drama. so you know it was good. damn was it good.

but it is dark, and twisted. and somewhat disturbing. just a heads up for you. was squirming in my seat trying to get through the dark scenes. but a masterpiece nonetheless.

yes, also starring Mila Kunis, an actress i only knew for That 70's Show and Breaking Up with Sarah Marshall.

she has proved me wrong, a versatile actress she is indeed ;) and almost my favourite. almost.

i didn't quite fully understand this movie at first, i had to let it settle for awhile, then only did i get it. please watch.

" i felt it. i felt - perfect" - Nina Sayer, Black Swan 2011

Chic Pop.

2011-01-23T13:32:00.000+08:00

the event was huge. and crowded, but fun nevertheless. i didn't really go there to shop ( LIES! ) but for the sake of hanging out with Wtf and Opie ♥

it was like blogshopping heaven, only you could actually feel and touch the stuff before buying. am i making sense? anyway, all my favourite blogshops were there. too many to mention here!

most of the pictures are of me, so sorry for revealing my cam-whorific nature.

budak cantik seronok dapat goodie bag!

Joyah


beby saya, sherah yang absolutely adorable.

nak gigit!

watif, shopping for good bargains

all the stuff i got from the event

a white top from kak ami schaheera and ohmygod i had butterflies in my stomach when she said hi. i was like, you recognize me!

a mustard top from a vintage shop, and an OBB belt that i have wanted to get my hands on for so long! OH OH AND -

This adorable rainbow ring :)

i had so much fun, and watif was like, bila ada lagi natang ni? nanti nak pergi ajak lagi! hell yeah. tapi agak kering lah pocket saya kalau gini.

wish i had a clearer picture of watif.

wish i had actually taken a picture with kak ami.

next time!

crackberry.

2011-01-20T18:34:00.000+08:00

last week our ECONS lecturer told us about money and what we would buy with it. she said STRAWBERRY. and that's exactly the point of this post. what can a starwberry do? can i blog? i know i can bbm and tweet and facebook like CRAZY but the rates and the fees and what nots?

i need help. i need to go to rehab before actually being claimed a crackberry.

the blackberry curve javelin 8900 via google

Can i Program my Boyfriend?

2011-01-18T09:35:00.001+08:00

can lah :)

reality check.

2011-01-17T23:26:00.000+08:00

i ain't gonna lie, about relationships, i'm terrible. i'm not just talking about bf-gf crap. like friends, family. i am just terrible. i am not the type of person who will take the time to text or call her parents the minute i arrive home. or call mom on a daily basis, not even a weekly basis. is that normal? and friends lagi lah. selagi kau tak message aku, call aku, selagi itu aku mati dalam perhubungan.

tapi, baru tadi buka tumblr maybill, dengan kehilangan teman nya. siapa tahu, mungkin teman seumur hidupnya. but we will never be able to find out, would we. i just had a small argument with brad. nothing huge, there never is anything huge with brad, but it made me think, i always take my loved ones for granted.

i am so sorry for your loss may. i pray for your strength. i pray for your loved one, wherever he may be. i pray that he is safe.

and to my loved ones, i love you eventhough i don't show it.

nak feymes?

2011-01-16T20:12:00.000+08:00

i think it's not easy to be famous. you should at least be able to be a few things beofre you dream of tasting stardom.

this is my point of view though, don't go 'why so serious' on me now.

to be famous as a blogger nowadays, dress well. no. dress lady gaga well! mix and match everything in your closet. EVERYTHING. my current blogger idol is ms. Aimie. well nt really a miss, she's married with a cute little boy. she is just fantastic. and so is ami schaheera, dari dulu sampai sekarang, always a fan
you have to be able to create new things, or be able to produce something with good quality. likeable stuff. like sis sueannajoe whose pictures are just magnificient. i don't necessarily understand photography or the art of it, but i appreciate her work. it gets to me. another gorgeous producer of goods, the lovely Jezmine Zaidan. finally, a designer who understands my tudung-ensamble needs. thank you dahhh-ling, you're a saviour to all us hijabi's.
you own a cute hedgehog and your relationship is almost 6 years long! ini aku tak tahu siapa sahaja yang mampu buat, tapi hudalunahussin berjaya.
you've gotta have that KAWKAW attitude, funny as hell and not afraid to show it, thus my newest discovery (acehcehh) maghiaelenazaghul. what can i say? she is hilarious, and it doesn't hurt that she's fluent in english and dresses up prettily! (i made up that word)
you're pretty and stylish, but you'd rather post pictures of other pretty and stylish people! shazlishasahar. kudos to you girl! i would love to do a specific post on you soon!
you have super talent, and a marketable face which coud possibly gain you instant stardom and a wave of fans. need i say whom? Justin Bieber. HELLO. oh, and Yuna :D i love you 3
you're an ass that s in desperate need of a reality check and you post pictures without permission and talk about sensitive issues as if you have that much balls when in fact, you're just another sad blogger with the intention of getting famous easy. yepp. uglylens. lensaburuk ka lensa pecah ka lensa lekap di mata warna turqouise ka.

so there you have it. useless tips from me. so if you don't have a talent, get one now! if you're ugly and are trying hard to fight peer pressure, dress up wild and create a lookbook like me! if you have a camera, take excellent pictures and show the world how a picture of stale cereal is meaningful and deep it makes you cry!

oh and shortnap subscribed to my youtube. SUBSCRIBED WEH!

WEH! AND SHE LIKED IT. SHE LIKED IT! *FAINT*

let's get famous like famous anus yaw.

Midnight.

2011-01-16T19:16:00.002+08:00

10 per cent more.

2011-01-16T18:26:00.000+08:00

*senyum kambing*

heh. did you read the last post? well right after i switched off my laptop, i saw a plug. right at the back of my head.

heh.

so here i am again, finally blogging Gideon style with pictures of myself continuously, with no reason but to tell stories of an ecstatic tasha. my stories aren't great, but my energy is. (do i sound like Guru Pitka?) let's go from NOWHERE, to NOW HERE. i love that part.

so i'm staying by myself in a room above a family's house, they are so nice and warm. PICTURES!

room for 1 more, any takers?

shopping for house stuff with Xano & Watif :)

just had to put this up.

i wasn't lying when i said i'm alone most of the time. this was yesterday at Sunway. can too much alone time kill you?

and there you have it. a Gideon post complete with gambarajah berpandu. oh and thank you 150 followers. me loves ya long time wan!

hope to write more soon, loves.

10 per cent.

2011-01-16T18:02:00.000+08:00

life is average here in Shah Alam. my room is cozy, but i have no internet, thus the lonesome walks and dinners by myself. am currently watching Brothers & Sisters season 1 & 2. ah, nothing better than a dose of drama. i have less than 9 minutes of battery here, so just thought i would say hi to all and tell you i'm doing fine. i have no friends though :( so if anyone in Shah Alam feels the same way i do, please drop m a comment :D

i'm in love with Scottie, Kevin's ex-boyfriend. is that weird? to crush on a gay guy? does that make me gay too? i don't care. he's so adorable i wanna eat him up!

love and hugs <3 i miss blogging, i miss you!

models with bumps.

2011-01-12T19:48:00.000+08:00

i am not talking about Miranda Kerr. i'm taking about natural bumps. and ironically, yes, goosebumps.
the initial feeling you get when you are introduced to Alexxis, our Leopard Gecko. her body has bumps on it, but she's softer than your baby's bum. i shit you not. and she is more manja than our cat Ninja. and she is definitely our plus sized model in the house because all she does is strike a pose. STRIKE A POSE BABY, YEAH.

yesterday i as watching CNTM (i was in my soppy drama mood swings after getting better from my fever) and guess who i saw?

pics credit to google

that's maryam from CNTM cycle 3 (?) i think. she's middle eastern kot. and gets bullied a lot because of her naivety (is that a word?) but her photos were awesome. she left the top four, after travelling overseas TWICE without a passport. pehh.

back to my soppy days of blocked noses and teary eyes.

*drama*

excuse.

2011-01-12T06:49:00.000+08:00

excuse as in please excuse my absence as i am in turbulent adapting mode. yes. it's the 2nd week of classes and i am down with a bad fever. but i did not mean excuse as in i am absent for classes hence my fever excuse. did that make sense? no? me neither.

battle of the bands.

2011-01-08T02:09:00.001+08:00

i don't think my MUET results are right. i am ashamed by the fact that i could not achieve a higher band.

tak best langsung into post setelah berhari tak online. hai, if you're readng this blog for the first time, my name i tasha, also known as tasha.gideon, and i am a perasan bagus girl who thinks she should've done better for her MUET.

older followers, you may have read that i am currently in sem 3 of my degree in Biomolecular Sciences in UiTM Shah Alam. it sucks big time because biomol is a subject from hell. FROM HELL!

but i have a few friends taking this course with me, so hell is not as bad as i think it is :) and being in Shah Alam, you would think, 'best ahh, tiap minggu ko boleh balik kan?' WRONG! ada lab sabtu malam. SABTU MALAM? and the killer paper i like really KILLER PAPER. gabung 3,4 subject in one paper. kalau aku sebut kat sini gerenti korang taknak baca. panjang sangat. kang kata poyo lak.

buat masa ini aku cuba bersabar. tapi MUET ni aku cukup tak puas hati. did i mention i'm in the same faculty as aishahbabi again?

La Bodega.

2011-01-02T01:37:00.000+08:00

this is supposed to be a picture post of my day out with brad tapi nak masukkan jugak muka dua orang ini.
:D

yang kecik itu serangga pelik gila babi. yang dua ekor itu manusia pelik gila baby.

seronok pakai hijab sebesar lapik meja makan.

cuba makan macaron. sedap. tapi not to die for.

favourite picture. focal point dia blur. orangnya blur.

nak kaler kuku lagi!

new year wajib post.

2011-01-02T00:27:00.000+08:00

banyak sangat ke benda nak azamkan? pagi tadi Ali messaged me, he asked what's my azam? masalahnya tiap tahun pun aku tiada azam. ali ada. abu pun ada. ajid lagi lah ada. aidil pun boleh (lebihlebih pulak) azam tak pernah ada. maka tahun ini, saya nak try list down some stuff i think would be good to be in my resolution list.

improve written and spoken english. my english vocabulary has been deteriorating since godfathers years ago. nobody's mistake but mine.
study study study like i've never studied before. bilik sewa sudah best, roomate sudah best, classmate hampir best, takkan~lah tak boleh succeed ye dak? (guna nada yang sesuai yaa kawankawan)
get to know myself better, improve, change for the better.
family. family. family. trying to be closer. i also would like to be able to go back to daddy's house without feeling like i HAVE to but as if i WANT to.
less shopping? (this is gonna be hard)

cukup tak macam itu? for now i think that should suffice. for now.

circles in squares.

2010-12-31T14:02:00.000+08:00

i have more important things to do then just say yes to you. and it's too bad if you can't take it. if you were a boyfriend, you would've been an ex to me months ago.

thank you period pain. lovely way to top the day off.

Forget You - Cee Lo cover by yours truly.

2010-12-30T20:19:00.000+08:00

this video is a month old. it's so old it has mold growing on its sidebars. but UMMEK & SHERAH were the first (and second) ones to view it. jangan rebutrebut kawankawan. hidup ini roda, dan roda adalah bulat seperti saya. maka bersabarlah kerana saya bukanlah orang yang bersabar. did you get that? did you pen that down in your NOTEBOOK? *nada Blue's Clues*

Forget You cover by me. my 2nd attempt sebab the first one tak sedap gila. yang ini tak sedap, tapi tak lah gila.

do checkout the Glee cover as well.

ini saya mamikasikan kepada Malaysia.

tahniah!

and for those yang request, i'm so sorry, tapi lagulagu itu saya cuba tapi tak jadi.langsung!

penat.

2010-12-30T02:54:00.000+08:00

i should have known better. it is definitely all on me. i know nobody will read this, but, hey, i had to vent these feelings somewhere, and facebook was not an option. i always wished i grew up in Bangsar ka, Damansara ka, pergi sekolahsekolah yang aku reject dulu sebab takutkan saingan. sekarang aku dah besar baru aku tahu, sekolah asrama penuh adalah platform. aku sangat berfikiran melayu, dari dulu sampai sekarang. SAMER itu bukan asrama penuh pun aku kena buang. apa masalah punya budak. sebenarnya masalah aku tiada kena mengena dengan pilihan sekolah menengah. aku tahu aku bijak pandai, kalau tak pandai brad takkan melekat.

aku dah penat jadi orang kampung. minda kolot. kau tak penat ke?
aku dah penat layan orang bandar, minda kampung.
aku penat. in general.

aku nak kenalan baru, tapi aku pasti aku takkan jumpa yang sekepala dalam kelas baru aku nanti. kenalan lama aku rasa lebih baik kau tahu dari sekarang yang aku memang takkan cari orang, orang cari aku.

siapa cari roomate call lah ai

Grinch.

2010-12-24T05:39:00.000+08:00

i do not like the idea of wrapping gifts for any occasion. you wrap it for 20 minutes, and tear it up in mere seconds. you throw away the wrapping paper. and not to mention the balance wrapping paper yang telebihlebih masa balutbalut.

I AM AGAINST WRAPPING PAPER. ITIS NOT ECO FRIENDLY. I AM TRYING TO SAVE MOTHER EARTH.

please just get me a capo and put a ribbon on it. thank you.

did i mention i'm a terrible gift wrapper?

Spilling the Goss!

2010-12-23T05:16:00.000+08:00

i am here again people! *snicker* and i bear great news of love and heartbreak. just to ask your opinions on this matter. let me pick your ~~nose~~ brain.

let's just get to the pictures, shall we :

Weddings of 2010

Isla Fisher from Confessions of a Shopaholic, and Sacha Baren Cohen of BORAT and UMEK'S favourite creature KING JULIAN of Madagascar. this is a quirky couple, but i like the combination.

" i want to make za love explosion, in your vaginee (vah-jheen) " Borat

my two homies yaw. Alicia Keys & Swiss Beatz ( ohmailawwdeh, lagu ini saya replay ulangulang dalam kereta http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A3fjGvRX5cg )

their baby is named Egypt :')

surprised? ada dua saja wedding gempaktown? of course Russell Brand and Katy Perry lah, tapi itu awak pasti tahu. ada yang lain tapi tak best dan tak popular dan mungkin akan bercerai minggu hadapan. but here's the best part,

BREAK-UPS!

they were like perfect arm candy for EACH OTHER. but hey, Ryan Reynolds is up for grabs, and so is ScarJo, gentlemen *wink*

masa ZaNessa baru nak hangathangatkan bara cinta, aku dalam hati macam, kau baru keluar sekolah nak bercinta serious? tahan ke? yes. tahan. tapi 5 tahun saja malangnya. my cousin cried after she confirmed their break-up =.=''

i heart Carey Mulligan because she is super cute with her short hair and sweet smile, kiranya kalau Shia LeBeouf tak pilih aku, at least dia dapat yang up 'sikit' lah dari aku. tapi kini itu semua tinggal kenangan.

siapa kenal ini siapa? kalau kenal, tahniah, anda seorang yang patut diharamkan dari menonton televisi!

yes, these are Miley's parents, Billy Ray & Tish.

kalau lepas ini keluar statement "oh Miley is just acting up and taking drugs because of the pressure prior to the divorce" - saya berani post kat blog (itu saja) tentangnya! woh, anak orang lain siap UPSR 5A PSRA 90% time makbapak diorang divorce, kau sedap saja sedut ganja.

apa annoying point of the post of the day today?

kalau kau rasa macam cinta kau dah cukup kukuh, dan kau tak sediakan back-up plan dari sekarang, aku cadangkan kau mulakan. sekarang (readers age by average 14 - 26) kita muda, maybe belum kongsi rumah, kongsi bank account, tapi satu hari nanti, bila sudah pun melaksanakannya, pastikan anda ada harta sekurang-kurangnya kereta untuk lari ke rumah mak time nak settle court case cerai. ini bukan doa. jauh sekali. if you think your break-up is bad, kau emo nak kelar tangan, fikirlah anakanak yang akan merasa 15X ganda sengsara kerana mereka hanya melihat, tetapi tak memahami situasi.

as for us teens (diam. aku teen lagi. twenteenwan) beringatlah kalau couple, percaya kena ada, tapi jangan 100%. setiap lelaki ada kelemahan.

what i am trying to say is, don't go into a relationship head first, always always respect yourself enough to terima kenyataan bahawa teman kita tak sempurna, dan tiada apa yang selamanya.

lately aku banyak bebel siot.

PORK BURGER? SEBELAH KAMPIT BERAS?

2010-12-23T03:30:00.001+08:00

Short post on how my 4 hour meet up went. hope you enjoyed my last post. harap ambil iktibar. kalau saya nampak awak commit fashion faux pas tersebut, saya tangkap gambar awak! :D
tajuk post menerangkan dua situasi berbeza, harap maklum.

in Simply Penang, we chose to sit next to the kampit beras. for no reason.

Table No : SEBELAH KAMPIT BERAS

yellow like his car

pink like his heart ♥

watched GUBRA with mummy tadi. i miss Yasmin and the way she showed us how to think outside the box. irony and all.

KEJAP! LAGI SATU!

kan selalu saya suggest pergi makan sana sini kan?

kedai ni dah bukak siot. aku bajet guraugurau je. takpelah. kita tak boleh selfish. Malaysia banyak kaum, bosan depa makan halal jaa takde babi. kita kena paham hati dan perasaan orang jugak. jangan kau muslim bantai masuk sudah laa. em. itu, kau settle dengan Tuhan lah ye? aku advise je :)

dah

creative learning. creative bitching.

2010-12-22T02:25:00.000+08:00

Before i start my CB ( creative bitching ) i would like to say sorry if this post offends anyone ( that is the EXACT point of this post ) aku bukan lah role model sesiapa. ingat tau. AKU BUKAN ROLE MODEL. and aku punya amalan pun tak normal. kejap ada tutup kepala, kejap tarak tutup kepala, tapi sekarang getting used to tutup kepala. this post isn't like a ceramah agama or a lecture on how to be a better muslim. this is just COMMON SENSE. YA? ya digg homeboys and homegirls?

okay. mari bermula!

ini natasha ( bukan nama sebenar ) dan beliau memakai jeggings SUPRE yang bersize S. bukan lah ianya ketat, tetapi extra ketat. nampak ketak ketak six pack betis. kerana beliau memakai jeggings, maka baju yang disarung, haruslah menutupi kawasan pinggul pinggang dan punggung. supaya six pack bahagian lain tidak kelihatan. ini dapat membanteras kewujudan CAMEL TOE & MUFFIN TOP yang berleluasa. di hujung sari berita penting akan disiar maksud keduadua fashion faux pas.

hai. ini ms. gideon ( juga bukan nama sebenar ) dan beliau memakai pakaian yang agak sama. cumanya, kerana ms. G adalah seseorang yang mengenakan tudung, maka beliau perlu menutup bahagian lengan dengan cardigan. dan selendang yang dikenakan juga sweet siap ada reben lagi you! akan tetapi bahagian peha ke bawah tetap menampakkan bentuk kaki nya. it's safe to say that only 45% of her body is covered properly. cardigan senseng, - 3%, tudung tak tutup dada - 2%, jeggings yang dipampang kepada masyarakat awam 40%.

apa yang cuba saya buktikan ni?

kalau nak berleggings, jangan lah sampai orang lain tengok geli. and kalau dah bertudung, bertutup kapala, jauhilah leggings. kok ye pun, pakai baju labuh sikit.

so let me explain Camel Toe aite ladies?

CAMEL TOE : the outline of a human female's labia majora, as seen through tightly fitting clothes

(i knew what a labia was since i was 10. pay attention in school kids. it's a dirty place!)

this is a real camel's toes.

nampak tak bahagian vajay-jay yang jelas menampakkan raut wajah camel toe?

do you see what i go through everyday looking at your camel toes? i cant even have a decent conversation without being distracted.

MUFFIN TOP : the phenomenon of overhanging flesh (fat) when it spills over the waistline of pants or skirts muffin spilling over its paper casing in a manner that resembles the top of a muffin. (wikipedia)

nampak tak cebisan cebisan muffin pada seluarnya? oh ini bukan nak kutuk orang bersaiz besar, trust me, i used to be a size 29-30 pants wise. tapi ini tujuannya untuk kutuk orang yang pinggang 29 tapi pakai skinnies size 25. or in this posts case, leggings. kalau tak muat, berserah sahaja. mungkin lebih baik awak tinggalkan leggings dan pakai jeans / skinnies. banyak hikmah hidup jadi manusia ni.

so there you have it people! fashion faux pas 101 with ms G ;) lepas ini, nampak orang pakai sebegini, you can judge them and label them thanks to me, your judgemental bitch blogger Ms G :)

oh ye, saya bukan role model, tapi saya model ilsyahijab ♥

super awesome !

2010-12-21T15:39:00.000+08:00

Caleb after his first hair cut.

look at those EYES!

potential future heart-breaker

langkasuka. kau tak suka aku peduli apa.

2010-12-20T04:48:00.000+08:00

feed your brain, feast your eyes, on MORE ANNOYENG PICTURES.

wrong category. this one goes under CUTE KITTEHS FTW

aku promote telekung tu. don't you want a good CGPA for life?

refer to this post.

what a bitch. egh. *blows on newly polished nails*

oh Dato', you're so funny!dinner at 8? sure. fetch me after Datin takes her sleeping pills ;)

colour blast. woah!

i seriously do not know why i'm posting this.

raksaksama.

2010-12-20T04:31:00.000+08:00

i have this freaky thought, you know how God is fair and just? well, you don't know personally. wait. this sounds like a question for my girlfriends 'you know that girl in the supermarket yang tinggitinggi muka lawa tu?'

again eh.

it's 4.17am and i am meeting brad and miwa tomorrow in Shah Alam to checkout my rumah sewa *positive smiles* but here i am, terfikir sesuatu yang mungkin ada benarnya.

God is fair & just. adil dan saksama. so if i were living as a human being for 21 years, muslim all my life, with MANY MANY sins, let's say my sin count is 10, 300 since puberty. so 21 years minus 14 (yes i had my period later than others) = 7 years.

ah chong has been a buddhist up to his 23rd birthday, and decides to convert to islam. his sin count in 7 years is only 5, 800.

if i were to be judged at this moment of my life, and Ah Chong at his 30th birthday (each 7 years being responsible muslims) then my count would be 10, 300 to 5, 800.

what is my freaky thought?
God is definitely Maha Bijaksana kan? what if there's a special calculation in the hereafter? like a CGPA of life. so that the calculation of our life is proportionate to others. kira macam kalau kau mati umur 109 dosa kau mesti banyak dari Rope'ah yang mati umur 30-an. must have connection wannn, kan?
why did i give you a mathematical question in the above paragraph?
to sound intelligent of course. i realize now that it's not relevant to my point of speech.

have you ever wondered? and then fell into deep thought?
i get lost in my thoughts, and sometimes i just have to write it down.

or just blog about it ;)

Mengada Bersahaja.

2010-12-19T03:25:00.000+08:00

lunch date

saya bagi chan lah muka awak hemsem muka saya kurang hemsem sekali kala

BUNGA TU PENTING!

this was delicious! aglio olio milo kopi'o

Loh See Fan Sik Fan Mow Sik Ahh!

can someone tell me what i just said?

tak sedap pun (?)

The Curve tapi lupa nama tempat ini. tak perlu cerita kot. ramai dah tahu tempat ini :)

IlsyaHijab Printed Collection II

www.littleilsya.com

saya dating dengan boyfriend saya ( overprotective girlfriend tone ) ehm ehm BOYFRIEND SAYA, makan sedapsedap then terus balik. saya tak sempat shoppeng and rakam video bagai macam perempuan peliks ini tapi saya sempat tangkap gambar tak berapa sweet dengan BOYFRIEND SAYA.

nanti lah saya upload mimik muka ketika menyebut baris perkataan BOYFRIEND SAYA ye?

gatal & horny bersahaja juga

coursemate ♥

2010-12-17T02:13:00.000+08:00

couple jakun tak pernah naik jejantas

tash : owww yeahhh gimme that pancakeessss

brad : *sigh*

this is my diploma mate :)

this is my best mate :)

this is my shopping mate :)

date mate :)

and now, coursemate & degree mate :)

and CGPA-sebijik-sama mate :)

congratulations !

life mate?

decent.

2010-12-16T01:29:00.000+08:00

decent - Conforming with generally accepted standards of respectable or moral behavior :)

don't you think, that FB and other modern technology has helped you gain enough FAT and FLAB and lessen your workload (what workload?) already?

is it SO FRICKING HARD to say happy birthday instead of HB *smiley face* WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?

isn't it decent if you said, hye, im stopping bye, reading some nice posts padahal i know the reason we all leave comments kat chatbox is to up traffic ryte? but please be polite enough to say it rather than 'bw :)'

aku ingt BW (blogwalking) tu macam BJ (blowjob) siot.

thats all. just wanted to share this ;)

Nangnak?

2010-12-13T04:09:00.000+08:00

i just burped out my dinner. not a nice way to start blogging.

i spent the night at Miwa's house the other day, and being, me, and Miwa, being herself, of course you know you'll get annoying pictures coming right atcha!

paling scary. gambar ini lah yang buat aku tidur rumah Miwa terus tak payah balik.

kau baca blog aku sebab lobang ini lah weh. percayalah!

tak cukup annoying lah gambar ni.

cuba describe apa yang anda rasa tentang gambar ini? adakah anda tersinggung? tersuka? tersyahwat?

you know you want me XOXO

seriau ka tak seriau ka tengok gambar ini?

Miwa

semangat tau pakai baju terbalik, siap letak tetek palsu (stokin pacman) kat badan supaya terhibur. kanak kanak zaman sekarang tengok TV je tau. cuba guna imaginasi. meh belajar dengan aku cara pakai tetek palsu dan cara buat BLOWJOB FACE macam dalam gambar last dalam post tersebut.

do you ever wonder why you like reading my blog?

Day 9 (NINE).

2010-12-12T00:05:00.000+08:00

Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life right now

because life is so simple it can be described with smileys. baru sedar blogger tiada butang smileys.

:D - ecstatic

:O - a lot of change in my life starting this month

this is the worst of the 10 day thingy -____________-" bodoh gila.
aku nak tukar jadi, TWO THINGS YOU'VE BOUGHT RECENTLY, AND FOR WHO?

1. pink shirt with english roses for myself
2. a DIVA ring from F21 for Andrea

okay. more meaningful :)

Day 8 (EIGHT).

2010-12-11T00:54:00.000+08:00

Day Eight: Three turn ons

susah ni. apa yang boleh turn on minah wacko ini?

REALLY GOOD FOOD! i would definitely get all orgasmic when i eat delicious food!
when its like totally hectic all around, and you lean in to whisper in my ear :O gahhhhh!
when an BAJU/SHOE/ITEM i really want is too cheap to be true i go like 'WHATTTTTT? OMAIGOD IM HYPERVENTILATING! MUST.HAVE!'

food is sexy, shopping is a rush, men are asses, thus i don't necessarily get turned on by them. but you're automatically sexy when you're YOU :)
♥

Day 7 (SEVEN).

2010-12-09T23:42:00.000+08:00

Day Seven: Four turn offs

bajet kacak dan macho.
tries to show off his not-so up-market gadgets in order to get my attention. IM NOT AS MATERIALISTIC AS YOU THINK.
BAJET FUNNY, tries so hard to BE FUNNY and then SIAP CAKAP 'sorry lah kalau you penat ketawa, i memang suka buat funny' fakoffpliss.
starts a conversation through text (phone/fb/twitter etc.) padahal pernah jumpa depandepan.

yes. much bad experiences has led me to write these down.

you should know who you are.

500.

2010-12-08T15:47:00.000+08:00

500 can bloody well mean anything. it can also mean nothing.

it can be the amount of money you get a month from your hardwrorking parents.
it could be the amount of money you blow off on materealistic items.

500 could be the times i wanted to call you, but never had the courage to.
500 could be the times i saw you texting her, right in front of me.

500 could be a large bill from a foreign country that is only worth a few cents in your own.
or it could be the bill that saves your ass from sleeping in the streets.

500. cheesy at it may seems, the title of the over-rated 'not-a-love' story.
500. lame as it may sound, the number of songs on my iPod.

500. a simple number defining what is, in my situation, the number of posts since the re-furbished blog came up.
500 rants you dear readers had to skim through to actually understand what i was ranting about.

500.

here's to another 500.

Day 6 (SIX).

2010-12-07T22:28:00.000+08:00

Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)

Mummy :)
Aunty M :)
Bradness :)
M&M :) ini memang kira sebagai satu package walaupun dua orang
grandparents ♥

definitely ramai lagi. definitely

i wish google were a real life application.

2010-12-07T21:24:00.000+08:00

at my chatbox Guest had asked me a question, in my post DAY TWO i said i am still searching for God. thank you guest :)

it's not so much about who God is, or what religion is the best, i'm merely searching for Him. people say God is everywhere, but i honestly do not feel it. some people say He is in your heart, your conscions. yes, but i don't feel it ALL the time. it's not that i have lost faith, it's a question we all must find ourselves. i'm not saying i'm seeking another religion or anything, hell no. i'm just searching for answers that people i've asked have not been able to answer. i wouldn't want to explain what kind of questions, but i'm sure we all ask ourselves these very riddles everyday. i used to be pious and religious and follow every single hukum you could imagine. but then i became very taksub. and i started condemning other people less pious than me. i admit that was very stupid and snobbish of me. but then i realized, while i was doing all this, i was taught that if i don't, i would go to hell. thus giving me the realization that i was doing good deeds for the wrong reason.

if i were to ask you now, the same question that was asked by Rabiatul Adawiyah, "why do you commit yourself to islam, and do good deeds and stay way from all the sins God has asked you to?" (lebih kurang beginilah soalannya)

the pious men she had confronted had answered, "well, to go to heaven, and so that we don't go to hell. why? isn't that why you commit yourself to God?"

Rabiatul Adawiyah said, " no. i do it for the sake of Allah the Almighty. if there were no heaven or hell, would you still commit yourself and be faithful in Him?"

so, would you? i ask myself over and over. if there were no big pot of gold in the end, would i still run the race? if there were no heaven or hell, would i still do all these things? most of the time, people tell me, "even one strand of hair is equivelant to ___ years in hell. you MUST cover up. kalau tak masuk api neraka tak takut ke?" (berapa tahun? 10? tak ingat)

jadi aku fikir balik, tutup aurat (example) is to cover up, and God has asked us to do so, to protect us from fitnah etc. jadi kenapa kita tetap dakwah pada orang saying DO THIS OR YOU WILL BURN IN THE DEEPEST DEPTHS OF HELL!

so this is what i mean. i am searching for God, and in the meanwhile, am searching for myself. i truly believe that when i find out the truth for myself, i would have found myself too. do i sound too eat . pray . love . 'ish? sorry, tiada kena mengena. i'm just saying, selama saya hidup, orang sekeliling semua ajar saya apa itu Tuhan, and what i should or should not believe in. i want to find out for myself. do my own research before i actually debate you on a certain topic. for now, my knowledge is limited, therefore i hope you don't take my advice too seriously in the future. search, for yourself.

:)

we all need to google once in a while. i hope this answered your question guest. only 3 people have asked me this, my mum, my uncle, and you :)
thank you.

Day 5 (FIVE).

2010-12-07T03:27:00.000+08:00

Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done

this is hard, because im scared of what would happen if i HAD changed the course of FRICKING NATURE!

i wish i were more creative.
i wish i hadnt done MICROFRICKINGBIOLOGY
i wish i got mad at the singaporean asshole that pushed me in the theatre. YOU MOTHERFUCK-KING ASS!
i wish i could control myself better as a child growing up in the midst of the divorce.
i wish i didn't date you.
sometimes i wish altogether that i weren't living in Malaysia with friggin arrogant ignorant malays. but the food keeps me going. so hallelujah for malaysia.

the last one was intentionally ironic so people can mock me. HAH!

various colours of shit.

2010-12-07T02:01:00.000+08:00

yesterday was my classmates wedding , Wina & Ismail ♥ AWWWWWW. met so many long lost classmates. that's what it is isn't it? when a wedding is held, it automatically turns into some sort of school reunion thingamajiggy. i for one, do not enjoy reunions but yesterday was fun :)

almost everyone.

must have photo

tu-weet nyew tawan tawan aiiii

gadis litar kampung merbau sempak bebeh

walaupun sudah makan dengan kenyang, tetap pergi ber-meatball'an di IKEA bersama rakanrakan. ramai nya manusia. nasib baik maia cop tempat duduk.

happy birthday to me <3

irmayahasmi selaku ball-lover

mirafatema selaku pembekal kasih sayang. ehem.


dan tashasandar selaku GELI club performer.

what's with the post title? well, eventhough i had fun and we had a nice meal for free semalam, today we paid for it with a whole day of diarrhea. running back and forth to the toilet. OHMAILAWDYYY. MY ASS HURTS.

nak berak bai

Day 4 (FOUR).

2010-12-06T01:21:00.000+08:00

Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot

how would you like it if i showed you my VPL and CAMEL TOE?
i hope mum approves of this!
what do other drivers think of me.
imagine myself as a cartoon.
sex (i think i'm a man, i think about sex often. why am i so perverted?)
his ass. and dimples. or dimples ON his ass! WATEFAHHH?
what to wear tomorrow?
how many hours of sleep i can get today.

my mind thinks like twitter. just so many updates, so little time ;)

and it was all Yellow.

2010-12-05T04:54:00.000+08:00

today's post is not about makanmakan, sadly. but i do have this craving for KFC and not just ANY KFC! but KFC yang disuapkan ke mulut sambil saya tengok movie. but that craving might not be satisfied just yet.

today wasn't about WHERE we went, but HOW we got there. abang kacak sudah ada chick magnet siot. beliau sudah memandu keretanya sendiri oh. ekzos nak bising, tingkap nak tinted, warna nak kuning.

KUNING.

maka selaku chick (walaupun tak hot chick) ai dibawa ronda menaiki automobilnya.

shopping malls all over KL sangat penuh

cukup eksaited tak muka ini?

an outing for a cottage mushroom.

yellowness defined


hotpink TRF flats / uptown maxi skirt / cocktails & martinis orion top / brands outlet scarf / MNG purple hobo

siapasiapa yang ada fetish dengan kereta kuning bolehlah hubungi abang kacak ini.

psst : aiza, i think jimmy ada kawan sekarang!